Negative Thoughts?

Have you ever had someone do you wrong? Not just a little misunderstanding, but something really hurtful and just plain wrong.  Did you cry?  Did you curse them?  Do you want revenge?  Do you want to scream from the rooftops what really happened but know it's just not the Christian thing to do?

I've struggled with this the past couple of months quite a bit. The hardest part, for me is forgiving and working through those negative feelings. Especially when, in my case, these people are continuing on the attack,  and will probably never ask to be forgiven.

A Christian friend told me the other day the way you know you have truly forgiven is when you want to bless that person.  I'm not there yet, but I'm working at it.

God is where I must have my focus. Pray, pray, pray.

The Bible tells us in Proverbs 23:7 "For as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."

I have got to stop letting negative thoughts control my emotions and day.-- There are so many horrible things going on in the world but I must focus on the good.--Look on the brighter side!
Constructive, pleasant, and positive! This can change lives, mine and others and it will draw positive results my way.

Meditate on These Things
     "Finally brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things.  The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you."
~Philippians 4:8-9

So here are a few things I'm so grateful for: (Positive Thoughts)

     Housework- I am blessed to have a home that is warm/cool and comfortable.
     Farm work- Even though on rainy days, I'm thankful I can care for our animals & in return I get food and companionship.
     Garden work- It's hard and hot but I know how to grow food and preserve it for later.

When I was homeschooling my children I used to have them keep a notebook and each day they had to say something they were grateful for and something they learned. If you can do that each day then you are learning and growing.

What are you grateful for today? I know for sure you can think of at least three things.

Do you struggle with negative thoughts? I'm hear to listen & give support.

I hope everyone has a blessed day.

Faithfulness

Yeti- our Great Pyrenees
Memaw- our adopted  chihuahua 

Over the years we have had many animals on our little farm. Chickens, ducks, quail, pigeons, rabbits, goats, pigs, and cats. None are as faithful as a good dog though.  We have had several of them too. Some were trained very well. Some were purchased for specific traits, and some were strays or ones that someone just didn't want anymore.

Dogs are always happy to see you and even if they do something wrong it is as if they understand and really try to do better and please their owners.  They put in a lot of work for us. Guarding the livestock, protecting our property, and the unconditional love they show us. They are faithful to us.
They trust us.  When they get older it's up to us to take care of them until their dying day.

Many things here our animals do reminds me of things in the 'real world.' 

Take for instance someone who has worked hard at a job. They show up every day, do a good job, and are being safe. This is being a faithful employee.  They too should be appreciated but are often times not. The business owner that treats their employees with carelessness and only thinks of his own greed will never keep faithful employees.

If I threw my dog some scraps and never petted or showed affection would he still be a good helper for us or would he try to get out and run away? Would he be aggressive?  Probably so because he has to be taught what is acceptable and what is not. Teaching and showing love takes time. It takes effort and it takes an unselfish attitude. 

This is in everything in our lives, our spouses, children, friends, and anything else we do. Including how we treat our pets, managing our homes, and taking care of ourselves.

So what about our relationship with the Lord?  Are we faithful in our everyday life? Do we make time to pray and read His word? 

Do you trust God to help you with your every day life?  Are you faithful?

Honestly, in the past years I've gone back and forth with being truly faithful in my study of Gods word. I know he is there but I try to lead and solve my own problems too much.  I allow my emotions to take control and make bad decisions.  However, when you do allow God control he is always faithful and always gives us hope. 

I  believe on day we will all stand face to face with the Lord and we will be rewarded for our faithfulness.

Luke 16.10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much.

Homemade Pizza Crust

Pepperoni, Onion, Bell Pepper, Olives, & Cheese
Yum!

I asked my friends what they would like to see on here and the most popular answer was food!  So here is my favorite homemade pizza crust recipe.

1 1/3 cups warm water
2 tsp. yeast
2 tsp. sugar or honey
2 T. oil
3 cups flour (wheat or white or a combo of both)

Put the yeast and honey into a bowl with the warm water. When frothy (about 5 minutes) stir in the oil.  Add the wet to the flour and knead for a few minutes until combined.  --I typically do this in my stand mixer but by hand is fine.

Allow to set and rise, covered with a towel for about an hour.

Shape into whatever size crust you like. Put onto a greased or parchment lined baking sheet.  I find this makes 2 regular pizzas or 4 individual ones, which is the way we typically do it.

Add whatever toppings you like and bake at 400 until done!

8 Little Ducklings

I shared last week about the severe storms we had here and the damages. Well, something really neat happened just a few days later.

We have a mallard hen who had been sitting on a nest of eggs. When the heavy metal blew into their enclosure we thought for sure they would have been hurt or possibly flown away.  They did not though. There were three huge pieces of heavy metal thrown but they balanced on one side of the fence. Her original shelter was blown off but this piece of metal sort of made a new roof.  The ground was flooded but she had built her next up so it was dry. There she sat sitting on her nest and hissing, as all good mother ducks do,  as we went out to see.

We had other more pressing things to handle so we left that the way it was for a couple of days. 

Well, two days ago, on Easter Sunday we came home from church to find her and 8 little ducklings there! 

We've had the privilege of witness much new life here on the farm. However, each time it is witnessing a miracle. 

What a strong, protective, and patient mother she was.
These little 8 will follow her around and learn how to do everything from eating, swimming, and the fear of predators from their mother.  Similar to how our babies learn from us.

We live in a fallen world and at this moment almost everything you see in the news shows how depraved and far from God many people are. You must take your role as a parent very seriously.  Look around at children and adults who have so few values. We must teach our children to be responsible, good, God fearing people. Be an example, don't just SAY  it, DO it.  Even if your children fall away keep praying! Keep being an example. Don't wait on friends, teachers, or even preachers to do it for you. As you see this does not work.

Having a relationship with the Lord and being saved is not the same as just saying you believe in Him. In James 2 it states that "Even the demons believe."  What will you say on judgement day?

In the Eye of the Storm

The pictures throughout are from our farm in Louisiana.

The song goes: 

"In the eye of the storm

You remain in control

And in the middle of the war

You guard my soul

You alone are the anchor

When my sails are torn

Your love surrounds me 

In the eye of the storm"

This past Saturday around 5:00 am. we went through a very rough storm, literally.  We had four large trees come down, two on fences. Some metal siding and other building materials get thrown around the yard and a pen we housed our mallard ducks in was destroyed. All around us there were downed trees, power lines, and cars and homes destroyed. We were without power and water for about 36 hours and no internet for 3 days. -Those were the bad things.

The good things, for us, were our main outbuildings and home were spared!  All of our family, livestock and pets were spared!  No loss of life I'm aware of nearby either!

So the question is, why?

I do not know. Why do bad things happen to anyone? Most wouldn't say they "deserve it" or "had it coming."  It just is what it is. 

My devotion this morning in part says this:

"Danger is an inevitable part of living, and God's provision doesn't always come with the removal of dangers.  However, the presence of the Shepherd should help banish our fears.  Life's most strengthening experience is the awareness of God's presence in our lives, no matter what difficulties come our way." ~W.A.B.

Could there be a blessing in this some way? Could lessons be learned? For me the answer is yes.

Back in the day, 😉 when we first moved here, we lost electricity all of the time. It seemed as though the wind blew the opposite direction and we were out for several hours. We also have survived here in the winter with no power for 4 days and one baby.  Things have changed in the past several years though. There are more houses and businesses nearby so lines have been improved and replaced and we haven't dealt with that nearly as much.

So I did have some things that we needed here.  I'm going to post a list of a few things that we find helpful during power outages.

These are just a few easy ones anyone should be able to have on any budget. -Dollar Tree-

1. Jugs of water for washing hands, brushing teeth. You can use old juice containers, milk jugs, etc. I keep a few of these in my laundry room.

2. More jugs or containers of water for drinking. This can include small water bottles but keep them out of extreme heat as plastic can leach out in them. --We also had a few jugs for pouring into our Berkey water filter.

3. A non-electric can opener and a few canned foods that could be eaten at room temp or heated up quickly in a pan.

4.  Throw away items so you do not have to wash dishes.- Paper plates, napkins, plastic forks, trash bags

5. Basic first aid kit.- band aids, peroxide, hand gel sanitize, perhaps some pain reliever 

6.  A light source- flash lights (batteries), candles, oil lamp (lighter or matches)

7. Pet food

Larger items that come in handy:

1.  A non-electric water filter - We have a Berkey and use it everyday for drinking water but it can filter even very dirty water if you needed to.

2.  A gas stove or outdoor burner. - we have both

3. A generator - we raise our own meat so usually have a full freezer and would hate to lose all of that

4.  Another water source- we have a pond and a swimming pool so we have water to use for flushing toilets

I'm sure there are more but these are just a few we used the past couple of days. Feel free to comment and add to this list.

Being prepared is good for everyone. If possible do a little extra for a neighbor or church member. I know from first hand experience many are not prepared for even a few hours let alone a couple of days.

We have several days of work ahead of us but we are thankful we have the health, strength and ability to do it. 

Remember to thank God every day for his faithfulness and the wisdom to know how to be prepared.

My Backstory! Part Three (including why we ditched public school)

All you need is a little sweet tea and a whole lot of Jesus! I love that saying. It sums up most of my life raising children.  As I said in part two, during nap times I started to dust off my Bible and actually read it.  The interesting thing about a Bible, and the language used is the more you read it the more you begin to 'get' it.  Mainly I would say a prayer before hand.  "Lord, please help me to understand and gain as much knowledge as I can to worship you." "Please give me wisdom and understanding." "I pray that today I will get strength from your word."  Trust me, it helps.  The more you read, the more I believe the holy spirit will guide you.

Everyone deals with stress and things differently.  I tend to want to withdraw.  I used to joke, and still do here and there about wanting to put bubble wrap around our house and just stay inside with the 4 of us.  No gossiping, no jealousy, just us being protected and feeling loved.  Wouldn't that be wonderful?  We all know it's not reality though.  Things happen.  People get sick, cars break down, loved ones careless words can cut deep.  The way to get through that is to know, and I mean really know that even though our feelings or bodies may be hurt, God is the answer to it all.  The Bible doesn't ever say that we aren't given more than we can handle. -I know it's a common phrase but it's not in the Bible.  Look at all the things that happened to people who loved the Lord in the Bible. The Bible does however tell us that it is Christ who gives us strength.

So why am I talking about stress?  It's because living on one small income can be stressful.  That doesn't mean it isn't doable though.  The first thing we did was when we could we would put some money aside for emergencies. A flat tire, a trip to the doctor, etc. All of these aren't easy when you have everything going out to something else.  We had bills for sure.  Our house, a car payment, a couple of credit cards, along with all the utilities. Of course we also had two young children and one now about to start Kindergarten.

So now we have one child in school and one at home. (They are 4 years apart)  School can be an expense as well.  We were able to have our son take a bus and he went to a smallish public school through the 4th grade.   During his school years I took a class so I could substitute teach, which had very low pay, but I mainly wanted to help out here and there.  I would say I substituted about 1-2 times per month.  I was also able to help out and be in the PTA, where I was President one year and treasurer another.  They were very friendly to me and most of the time I was allowed to bring Abigail, which was great. (For PTA events and parties, not teaching)

I was still reading my Bible and I would watch sermons on tv but we were not attending an actual church.  During that time  I also happened upon a magazine add about homeschooling.  It was called The Old Schoolhouse.  They had a coupon for a free copy so I sent for it.  I was intrigued.  Something inside was tugging at me.  I could not stop thinking about the hearts of my children and how things were starting to be taught in schools that were far from Biblical. I continued on thinking that was just a silly thought.  I mean, we weren't hippies or Amish. LOL.  I continued to research online about homeschooling.  Over the summer I went to a local Christian book store and bought 3 books about it.  One was a family who were succeeding at it, another was a curriculum book for 4th grade and another by a man named John Holt.

Summer was about over and after talking with my husband and a couple of other relatives and friends we decided that he would go back to school.  I personally would have started that year, but my husband was not convinced and wanted him in school. (The other relatives thought I'd lost my mind and didn't hesitate to let me know it.)   So back he went. Most of that year went ok but I never did give up wanting to home school.  Toward the end of the year there was an incident that I witnessed while substituting in a first grade class.  (This didn't involve my child but I won't go into detail just to protect identities)  I never stopped thinking about that.

After reading the books I had, especially the Holt one, I just couldn't get over the thought of losing my children's hearts to this "system."  About a week later I got my usual magazine in from Countryside Magazine.  There was an article about homeschooling in it too!  I read it to my husband and explained about the other things I had been reading and how I had been feeling.  He decided that it would be ok to let me try to home school the children for the following year.  I also found out through a friend that there was a local group in our area of other Christian home schoolers. My friend, Kris, and I went to a meeting there and it was AMAZING! To meet others who didn't think I'd lost my mind and understood exactly what my concerns were.   So in 2003 my son did not go back for the 5th grade. My daughter did not start Kindergarten.  We began our homeschooling journey.  It's got it's own set of trials and triumphs but I will say I'm so grateful we did it.  We ended up homeschooling for the next 13 years!

Having the kids at home gave our whole family the freedom to chose the way to learn.  The world really is a giant class room. Reading the Bible and making a point of including God in your everyday world makes it work.  Now, we did use actual books and workbooks. The library was like our second home and FINALLY one day they extended cable internet to our area! That was and still is one bill I don't mind paying. We all learned things together.  From repairing our own vehicles to butchering animals. EVERYTHING you do on a day to day basis is learning. At dinner we would talk about what we each learned that day.  If you learned at least one new thing in a day I consider that a success!

We were still paying down our debt. My husband loved his job, and I was enjoying mine more and more.  I continued writing some and submitting things to magazines for contests and things.  I was published twice in a homeschooling magazine and they did a featured article on our family in Cooking Light magazine.  I also have several recipes published in Cooking Light, Quick Cooking, and Miserly Moms recipe books. Each time you would just get a small check but it was a hobby I really enjoyed. We continued to add some animals here. Pigs, ducks, more chickens, quail, and goats.

Fast forward... Several years ago my husbands boss passed away and the business closed.  Luckily my husband got another job pretty soon.  We were debt free by then, including our home and land. We were stocked on food and most necessities so while it was a short but unnerving time we knew we would be ok for a while.  Which leads me to the real reason for this blog. I'm not an expert but I am a regular mom who has done it.  I want to share with anyone that if it is in your heart to be a homemaker, home schooler, homesteader, etc.  YOU CAN DO IT!  Even if you don't have acreage or animals.  If you get yourself on a realistic budget and live below your means you can have a happy, less stressful life.  You can enjoy your marriage and children!




*If you stayed with my story to the end, thank you!  I really look forward to getting more into detail on how you can thrive on one income, how Jesus is the key to it all, and my triumphs and failures on the way along!
I plan on posting on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. 

My Backstory! Part Two

The world we knew.  The childhood years I could remember my own mother worked most of the time. She did all sorts of things from owning a business, working at a bank, to cleaning houses. My husband had the same experience. His mother worked at a local factory for many years until she retired. We went to public schools all of our lives and we were taught that you need a college degree and a career.  Why? To buy the best of the best.  Success here in America, at least in my world, was exactly this:  A nice big house in town, two nice new vehicles, an extravagant vacation every summer, eating out at nice restaurants often, then throw in two kids and a dog and you have your perfect little picture. The problem is many, not all, of the people I know with all of this are the most stressed out unhappy people when you really get to know them. It's not that having all of these things are bad at all.  It's thinking that you are a failure if you don't.  So in my mind, by me not working, we would never have all of these things.  This was no longer a stepping stone to all of the things I wanted and thought we needed.  I was in a way failing my family. As much as I loved my son and I 'liked' where we were, in the back of my mind I was a failure.

Due to my thinking that we needed to have everything "better" I probably drove my husband nuts. No, I know I did. I finally shared my feelings about feeling I failed and to be completely honest here, he wasn't so crazy I wasn't working back then after a while either. He liked that his needs were met and so were our sons, but after a while of having to get up every morning and leave super early while I got to stay in bed started to wear on him too. We didn't argue a whole lot, but we did consider me going back to work.  It didn't help him much either that out of all of our friends and family I was the ONLY mother who wasn't working.  In the end I decided to clean a couple of houses.  I found two.  I let them know I had a son who would be accompanying me and one was fine with that the other was not. So once a week my mother would watch my son, who was around 3 at that time, for about 3-4 hours and I would go clean that house.  The other one she didn't mind him coming and I would bring a video and snacks and he would play with their dog. He was never one of those kids to just be unruly or destructive so it worked out well. I did that for about a year and it made enough to pay for our groceries. This was a very good solution for us.  ~I am glossing over this area a bit. It wasn't always a great time. I found out someone I trusted was not who I thought and to this day there is a big wedge in the family.  Times were tight financially until I found the houses but then it all started to fall into place.

During those lean times my budgeting and cooking skills began to improve.  We sat down and wrote out everything we owed and how much we could possibly pay to try to be debt free.  For our household needs we really paid attention to what we really needed versus just wanted.  My mom was a good role model in clearance shopping. I've always enjoyed garage sales and a good thrift store.I still do to this day. Most of our clothes, furniture, and home goods have come from them.  In the kitchen I learned how to really get creative and make many things from scratch. No more canned beans or boxed meals unless they were on a deep discount.  I made our bread from scratch and rice was now no longer bought in 5 minute boxes.  We also planted a small garden and got some chickens! My husband's love of the outdoors was a benefit too as he's a wonderful provider of fresh fish and wild game like rabbit and deer.

We were on our way and doing pretty well.  During that next year we had a teenage family member move in with us for a few months and I found out I was expecting our second child.  I ended up quitting the house cleaning when it was time for my son to start preschool.  Times were still lean but I was overjoyed that we would be adding a new baby to our family! In November of 1998 we welcomed our second child, a beautiful baby girl we named Abigail, into the world!

This was a really great time for us. We started becoming more self-sufficient and were getting some credit paid off in the process.  Other than my son's preschool 3 days a week, we stayed home a lot.  My nephew, who is a month younger than my son would stay with us most days after preschool while his parents worked.  This worked out fairly well because the boys had each other as playmates.

I know many may think how boring and unsatisfying my life must have been. To be home barefoot with little ones around all day. Well, no, actually. First off, I love to be barefoot.  Sure, I was stressed at times as all mothers are but for the most part I found comfort in just being a wife and mother.  I had a schedule for myself and I started enjoying to organize and cook and clean.  I even found a like for singing along to Disney and Barney videos.  LOL. -Back then we had no cable TV.   I also began to pull an old brown book off the shelf again during nap times.  My Bible.

*If you stayed with my story to the end, thank you!  I really look forward to getting more into detail on how you can thrive on one income, how Jesus is the key to it all, and my triumphs and failures on the way along!
I plan on posting on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

My Backstory! Part One

When I was young I always wanted to be a writer.  I used to write short stories and plays for my friends to read and act out.  I was ok at it but I wouldn't say extraordinary by any means.  I didn't care though. To me it was fun. I could dream and get lost in those dreams.  When I got into high school I decided that writing books would be too boring. That a hard hitting journalist was where I wanted to be. I would move to a big city like New York or Chicago and I would be a top reporter and eventually a news anchor.

Life tends to be strange and laugh at us at times. I ended up not doing either of those.  I met the boy I would still love in that same high school.  We married right after graduation and found out we would be parents just two months later.

He worked as a machinist and I as an assistant at a chiropractors office.  We lived in a little one bedroom apartment and I thought it was pretty great.  We were pretty good with money and being frugal. We moved into a two bedroom rental right before we welcomed our son into the world.  About six months later we were told we would have to move because the woman we were renting from was divorcing and needed to move back into the home we were renting.

Not sure what to do and with very little money we were offered a deal from my husband's mother & step-father. We could buy half of their land for a decent price and build or buy a mobile home to put on the property. While we liked the idea we really weren't sure how it would work out being so close to family and all.  We looked around but with not having much time or funds we took them up on their generous offer.

A couple of months and lots of dollars later, we moved into a 16 x 80 new single wide mobile home. It was very nice. Due to the year we bought it and the current style, it was all decked out in maroon carpeting and a pinkish, maroon color theme.  I must say I really liked it.  Most importantly it was all ours.

During that time my husband and I both worked full-time.  He had changed employers and now was at a really nice tool and die shop and I had left the chiropractor for a receptionist position at a local hospital.  We had benefits, a little more money, and our own place.  We should have been so happy, right?  I think my husband was but I really wasn't.

Why wasn't I so happy? Mainly because early every morning I had to go drop off our beautiful son to the care of other people at a day care center. He didn't cry much but he would just look at me so sad. I'd have to set him at a breakfast table with a bowl of cereal and wave goodbye not to see him for about 9 hours.  While I do think it wasn't a bad center, it's not home with mom where children really belong. He got many colds and so would I along with whatever else these poor children would come to day care with. We spent much time at the doctor with ear infections and sinus issues.

I, at work in a hospital, thought that I had a pretty good job, but my boss would be very angry if anyone would have to take time off to take care of sick kids or anything.  She was a very angry spiteful woman. Mostly, other than the doctors I worked for were other women. Some nice and some very hurtful. Most of us really didn't want to be there but felt we had to. I think in some people this can be a trigger for making other people miserable. If I ever mentioned about feeling bad about leaving my son it was usually returned with the typical explanations to make working mothers feel better. "It's better in the long run for them to learn to stand on their own." "They need friends to play with."  "You want your child to be social don't you?"  The main one was "You'll get used to it."  Well, I never really felt that I did.

I started getting bad headaches and was diagnosed with migraines.  I didn't sleep well and that didn't help.  Eventually, I did get a promotion and was going to go work in another private office located off the hospital grounds. I was thrilled to get out of that mostly hostile environment.  Well the Friday before I was to start my new position I was told by that "lovely" boss that she had changed her mind and another woman would get the position.  That I also couldn't stay in my current position because the girl I had trained (her cousin) would still be taking my spot.  I would go back to being what they called a floater.  So my raise was gone and I was super confused.  There was no disciplinary reason she just "decided."  When I left that afternoon I was in tears.  I hated this job. I hated leaving my son all day and for what really?

That weekend my husband and I sat down and went though our budget. We decided that it made sense to stay home really but I didn't want to be a free loader and only have him work.  So I started looking for a part time job.  Come to find out part time jobs don't pay much and by the time I would have to get a baby sitter we would actually be paying for me to work.

So began my life as a stay at home mother.  I wish I could say it was all because we realized that this is God's intention for families and that is why we decided this but no, that was our realization a couple of years later.  By this time our son was about 2 1/2 years old.  He is now 24!

Want to hear the rest of the story? How we came to raise our own  vegetables and meat? When we added another child into the mix? How we were able to afford all of this on such a small budget?  Stay tuned.  I will continue the story on Wednesday.


*If you stayed with my story to the end, thank you!  I really look forward to getting more into detail on how you can thrive on one income, how Jesus is the key to it all, and my triumphs and failures on the way along!